Friday, April 16, 2010

Miracle Moments

Easter Egg Hunt 2010: What blessings (my friends and the babies!) All of these babies were delivered by Dr. Birch!
Thanks for taking these pics, Meagan!

Wow, it has been a while since I've updated my blog. I have written a few posts in my mind, but I either haven't had the time to type it out or once I "wrote" them in my brain I didn't feel the need to vent it on here :-)
My sister made me an awesome CD of Christian songs that I'm listening to right now. Third Day's King of Glory is playing right now as I type this and it is distracting because I just want to sing along and praise Jesus for the amazing things He's doing in my life. (Listen to it below!)


I feel like God is stretching and "growing" me daily. In the last week alone I have learned so much in my bible studies and GriefShare group that I'm not even sure I can condense it into one post...but I'm going to try!
In our ladies bible study on Thursday night we studied the lies women believe about emotions. Just because we feel something does not mean that it is true. "We may feel unloved, but that does not mean we are unloved, we may feel alone, but that does not mean we are alone...The Truth is, God is good, whether I feel like He is or not...we must remember that "feeling good" is not the ultimate objective in the Christian's life..." (DeMoss pgs194 and 210)

Wow: How well do I know the above to be true! I've said it myself in earlier posts-we are not told that when we become Christians we will live suffering-free lives and all will be well--actually we are told that we will suffer.
I believe it is our response and reactions to the trials in life that shows our God and those around us our true beliefs and character. We can't just talk the talk, we have to walk the walk.
Sweet Thomas-He is a perfect baby in every way.

In the last two weeks of our GriefShare group I have learned:
"we may be thinking that the absence of pain is a sign of healing. Real healing is characterized by the presence of both joy and pain."
I still struggle at times with feeling guilty for being happy. In this GriefShare session we talked about how pain and joy coexist and that grief can actually expand your ability to feel joy...eventually.
I love this from my notes, "If you believe He is good during the "good" times, He is good during the bad." "In a fallen world, pain is a part of life. When it comes, express your confidence in God's ability to use your suffering for good, by being joyful about your inevitable character development."
Some days I can say amen to this "inevitable character development", and yet some days I am upset about this development because it came from such a horrendous event--that probably doesn't make sense, but that's how I feel.....I am working on this though!

We also had a wonderful conversation about how we get to have "glimpses of Heaven" in what GriefShare calls "miracle moments." First of all I was amazed to hear that the majority of people going through grief have also experienced these "moments" as I have. I have felt that maybe I was reading too much into these moments, but now I feel like I have confirmation that they are from God (as I thought they were!) I think most of you out there have had these experiences, but maybe not considered the source.My adorable nephew, Jett. How I love you!!

Non-christians and skeptics would call them coincidences. I've heard somewhere that coincidences are when God wants to be remain anonymous and actually the day after this GriefShare discussion my friend Shelly's mom ran into me and brought this topic up herself! She says, "It's not odd, it's God!" I love that. SO it's not odd that she ran into me the day after our miracle moment discussion at Griefshare, it was God showing his control and love for me and my life.
I also know some people may get hung up on the word "miracle," don't let it! I'm not talking about miracles like when Jesus turned water into wine (although He, of course, still has the power to do this today!) I'm talking about the miracle moments like God giving me a sister who loves me with such an unconditional love that it feels my eyes with tears. And another miracle moment when Caroline told me back in late November that daddy had told her that Hannah was in heaven with him when Caroline was just two years old and had no background knowledge of Hannah's serious situation.
Sweet Caroline is growing up: Just this week "Step-pool" turned to "stepstool" at least you still say "Slipslop" for flipflop! :-)

Another miracle moment for me was the terrible day of the funeral when I absolutely could not will my muscles to lift myself out of bed and I said a short prayer and--there is no other way to describe it--God lifted me out of that bed and made my feet walk to the car. I did not move myself-I am certain. It was Him.
I am unable to list every miracle moment that I have had in the past year and a half--it would take hours! Lots of the moments come as an email or phone call at the exact moment I need it. Or a prayer that is answered so obviously, for example--I have been wanting to learn more about the bible to be able to teach my children and the PERFECT study is presented. It has taken about a month to go from Genesis 1:1 to chapter 20, but that is a perfect pace for me and my limited knowledge!

On a smaller miracle scale, but just as mighty of a miracle is what I see in my children. Caroline's love for God and caring heart is growing before my very eyes and baby Thomas' sweet constant smiles bring me glimpses of heaven on a daily basis. Thank you, God.
"Heaven is real, and everyone on earth has the choice to go there. Nothing on earth compares with heaven...A person in heaven wouldn't even want to come back here. While I wait for my turn to be with You in heaven, help me to live purposefully and be devoted to doing your work." (Griefshare Session 13)

7 comments:

  1. Bonnie...These moments are so true. I had seen them after my mom died in Nov, and I was thinking...it must be God giving me peace, but you still wonder. It was strange b/c God had given us several "signs" in advance, but we didn't realize what they were about. However, a dear lady at my church that lost her brother said to me after my mom died, "Kristi, in moments like these, if you let yourself be vulnerable, God will send you moments that you can see His presence in signs...it's from these things you will get peace." It relieved me SOOO much to know that I wasn't the only one experiencing this. So, it thrills my heart to hear you talk about these, too! They sure make me excited about Heaven. My mom would have loved to know all of these signs that God has blessed us with knowing that it is all ok, and He is in control, no matter how much it hurts. Thanks for always posting. It really helps others so much!

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  2. what beautiful writing! hope you have more miracle moments this week!

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  3. "It's not odd, it's God." I love that. Thank you so much for sharing.

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  4. What a beautiful post....I have not had enough blog time lately...So glad that I stopped by tonight..Be sure and stop by main blog
    http://teresa-grammygirlfriend.blogspot.com/2010/04/i-think-god-smiled.html
    and witness a miracle.

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  5. I haven't looked at your blog in a while but I have to say what a beautiful reminder of your sweet husband your baby is. He looks just like him. What a wonderful family you have. YOu trully are blessed!!!!

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