The book we just finished My Single Mom Life by Angela Thomas (a MUST read for any single mom in any situation) talks about not waiting for a special occasion or until you feel "worthy" to light your candles, or use the best dishes, or invite friends over for dinner. Our children will miss out if we wait!
This also parallels her advice that we don't have years to devote to "bettering" ourselves. If we wait years until we arrive at some contrived place to start being a great mom, our kids will be all grown up! We have to be amazing moms NOW!
This includes inviting friends and playmates for our kids over to dinner...so what if our house is a wreck or we don't have a huge home-cooked meal. No one will notice! There will be enough to go around, just make it work!
I also believe this applies to starting or continuing traditions. It's sad how I went through a time when I didn't know if a family of three like ours was complete enough to start new traditions or that it might be too painful to continue traditions we already had. Blessedly, I came through that phase pretty quickly.
Caroline and I decided it would be fun to always have chocolate chip pancakes for breakfast on our birthdays, starting with Thomas's!
My new, wonderful friend Shannon reminded us of this "don't wait for life to begin" idea when she gave her example of how she shared a dinner with her daughter's playmate at the spur of the moment. Do you think the girls remember what they ate or what the place settings looked like? NO! They will remember a warm, fun time sharing life!After hearing her talk about how she is not just thinking about this advice, she's living it; I wanted to do the same. I wanted to light our candles! And use those serving dishes usually reserved for "special" occasions! My children are special and they deserve it!
Later that same week I told Caroline we were going to have candles at dinner and she ran around the room so excited and telling Thomas all about it, it was adorable. I got everything ready, our cantaloupe, ravioli and sauce (from Bertoli's, I think, I know I didn't make it from scratch--i'm admitting it. Who cares!?) and put it in our fancy serving bowls and then went to find candles.
And then I couldn't find any. Not one!
I wasn't going to let this stop us. I remembered what Shannon said, she said she didn't have candles in nice matching holders, she just used the ones from around the house. Scented, or unscented, in a jar or on a plate--it doesn't matter!
So the only candles I had were a few in a drawer meant for a birthday cake. WHO CARES!? Caroline and Thomas sure didn't! We lit them and ate a meal that would normally be forgotten, but now has been made a memory!
I LOVE THESE CHILDREN FIERCELY!!!Now, go and light your own candles! :-)
I love that advice. I think it honestly could go for anyone. So often all of us forget to appreciate the every day moments. We get those good dishes out just for the holidays and forget we even have them rest of the year. Think I will get the good dishes out tonight for our dinner and even light some candles. Hope you have a truly Blessed day.
ReplyDeleteGreat story Bonnie! We will be "lighting our candles" this week! I will post pictures! Blessings to you today and everyday! Hugs.....
ReplyDeleteI love you so much, Bonnie! I need to take this advice to heart. In my world everything has to be perfect before I can enjoy anything. The reality is...IT WILL NEVER BE PERFECT! Kiss those babies for me.
ReplyDeleteLove that idea! Really, we all need to do more of that. That has been my goal...to clean out my attic and find my good China and actually use it. And I do need to light more candles. Thank you for the reminder. Love ya and Miss ya!
ReplyDeleteWhat wonderful advice that we should all take to heart and do more often! Every day is a "special" occasion. Your children are beautiful!
ReplyDeleteLove this post!!! There is an email that circulates around every now and then that talks about this and I always think "Aww, so true" and then go about my way. Thanks for reminding me to "light my candles" and be a great example of how to do it NOW and not just read about it!!!
ReplyDeleteAdorable. I love that Caroline was so excited about it. :)
ReplyDeleteThank you for those thoughts! I left my Christmas dishes in the cabinet last year! Shame!
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ReplyDeleteAwww, such a sweet post! Adalyn and I love to have 'fancy' dinners with candlelight and music, she even drinks out of a mini goblet, haha!...I need to work on getting those fancy dishes out! Thanks for the inspiration once again!
ReplyDeleteWe started the tradition of having a chocolate chip pancake breakfast every time it snows after you guys stayed at our house during the snow storm. We ended up having a lot of chocolate chip pancakes last winter because we had so much snow, but I also learned from you to start keeping a bag of chocolate chips and some Bisquick in the pantry at all times (it's ok not to make them from scratch) and it made it so much easier to keep the tradition going and celebrate the snow! Thanks for another reminder. Hopefully our kids will do the same for their own kids if we try to make every day special. Love you!
ReplyDeleteI love this post! Great idea...Bonnie you truly are an inspiration, your children are so blessed to have such a strong and amazing mother!
ReplyDeleteYou are a courageous woman...Making memories for your children that will bless them as they grow!
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