Sunday, October 10, 2010

God is Love

I've started and stopped this post in my mind at least one hundred times. (I don't exaggerate unless I tell you I am so that you'll believe me when I state numbers.)
Someone mentioned to me they had noticed I hadn't updated my blog in a while. It's because I know I cannot post again until I post this one...

I'd like to ask everyone to say a prayer right now to have an open heart and mind as you read my thoughts in this post.
God has blessed me immensely over the last months. I mentioned in my last couple of posts how the process of healing will go on forever, but God has allowed me to be joyful again. I got to the point that I honestly told God, "Okay, you and me, God. We're going to raise these children to be amazing adults and I have complete faith that I can do this alone (with You.)" I truly believed this and felt the bondage of fear for my sweet children's future fade away. I felt the fear of being a single mom fade away. I felt the sharp edge of the pain I felt for what their dad was missing as our children grew before my eyes, dull to a manageable sadness that had a more pronounced happiness as I understood more and more that Thomas is not sad. He is complete in heaven, where we all will be one day.
"And now, dear brothers and sisters, we want you to know what will happen to the believers who have died so you will not grieve like people who have no hope. For since we believe that Jesus died and was raised to life again, we also believe that when Jesus returns, God will bring back with him the believers who have died." 1 Thessalonians 4:13 - 14
The overwhelming emotion that came with the release of fear and apprehension was love and joy. I had several books with titles describing Joy after Mourning, joy comes in the morning, and every other combination, but I didn't understand how I could ever feel joy when I was in the throes of grief. Yet, the bible proved itself to me again. It is true--a surrendering of our worries and fears to God leaves us with a security in Him. I'm so glad I now have relieved my friends, family, co-workers and even my children the responsibility of my "secure-ness". It's not their job to make or keep me happy. (You all can thank me later ;-) )
"Those who have been ransomed by the Lord will return. They will enter Jerusalem singing, crowned with everlasting joy. Sorrow and mourning will disappear, and they will be filled with joy and gladness." Isaiah 51:11 
  So, I come to the next chapter of my life.
I have thrown myself into the author Angela Thomas' (My Single Mom Life) philosophy of becoming the most amazing moms we can be with God as the leader of our lives. I'm involved with three ongoing bible studies and each one has taught me an incredible amount about how and why God works in our lives and what matters most in this life. 

"So be truly glad. There is wonderful joy ahead, even though you have to endure many trials for a little while. These trials will show that your faith is genuine. It is being tested as fire tests and purifies gold -- though your faith is far more precious than mere gold. So when your faith remains strong through many trials, it will bring you much praise and glory and honor on the day when Jesus Christ is revealed to the whole world." 1 Peter 1:6 - 7
So...
I was content and ready to live my single mom life with God helping me raise my sweet kids.  We were going to be not just "ok," we were going to be amazing! I also felt after going through GriefShare counseling for two semesters and hearing them talk about dating after being widowed that maybe in 20 years or so I'd think about dating.
So along came Tyler King.
The strange thing is...he's sort of always been around.
He ran in a circle of friends in our same christian campus group (Razorbacks for Christ) that was just different enough from my own that our circles only seldom intersected. Thomas and I definitely knew and respected Tyler from seeing him teach and attend our church for years, but we did not know each other.
Early this summer our paths crossed a few times when our small groups from church intersected.
There really is not another way to say it, but after hanging out several times with our mutual friends I woke up one morning and I felt like God had literally flipped a switch in my heart and a rush of emotions came over me for him!
I was shocked and excited and nervous. I kept it completely to myself for a couple of weeks because I wanted to make sure these were real feelings and that they were really specifically for Tyler and not just the thought of dating or something else going on. Finally, I decided I needed outside perspective and confided in my sister. I waited until I was driving us somewhere together so I didn't have to look her in
the eyes. (I just knew she would tell me in an unintentionally patronizing way, "Oh it is too soon...just be patient...he's a great guy but..." But oh no, she did nothing of the sort.
I started it with just "what do you think about Tyler and I together?" she sat
quietly for a few seconds and then with tears in her eyes said "Bonnie, this
will sound crazy, but God told me a long time ago that you and Tyler would be
together and it would be great."
(Before I go any further, please realize we aren't usually the get a "burning bush" sign from God kind of people...)
I about had to pull the car over.
I asked her to explain and she said that she was so distraught for me and my
kids that she took it to God and He comforted her with that thought. That Tyler
and I would be together.
WOW.
I prayed hard about it and I knew I needed to talk to Tyler about what God was telling me.
Basically, we both told each other that same night that we felt God telling us that we are
supposed to be together.

Even the movies could not make this stuff up.


God knew I did not want to date. He knew how important my family and friends are to me and they would protect me at all costs. God specifically sent Tyler to me. Everyone that knows me, knows Tyler (very well! Yet, I did not know Tyler before this summer!) My family and friends are thrilled because they know us. They have seen Tyler's day to day life of character, warmth and caring. They know I am seeking God at all costs and determined to raise Caroline and Thomas to be happy, godly children. They are seeing the work of God at work.
It's amazing and it's God.

I am more surprised than anyone at the timing, but I trust God and His plan whole-heartedly. I was worried for a while what people might think, but God has taught me some wonderful messages of the utmost importance:
  • No opinion matters, except God's. I answer only to Him.
  • God knows what I, Caroline and Thomas need.
  • No one has any place judging a person's decisions who is seeking God's will...And no one can ever "walk in someone's shoes." Even though I have met some amazing young widowed mommas, not one of us can completely understand each others' journey.
  • God is Love. He gave us an amazing gift: the ability to love!
Thomas and I truly loved each other and had a great marriage. I'm blessed to know what a great marriage is because of him. I remember thinking when we knew we wanted a second child, "How can I love another child as I love sweet Caroline?" God's abundant love for his people is mirrored by how we have the ability to love each other. And when Baby T came along...I did not replace the love I had for my first child, or try to take some of the love from her to give to him, my capacity to love GREW. Wow. God is gracious.
Over and over through our dating and marriage Thomas would say "I only want for you to be happy." It is imprinted on my heart forever.
And I can say I am truly happy again. Praise God from whom all blessings flow!

Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love. 1 John 4:8


Tyler and I are committed to keeping God at the center of our relationship and
we are so thankful for what He has done in our lives.

74 comments:

  1. Bonnie, I am SO happy for you and Caroline and Thomas, and I pray that God will pour out his blessings on the three of you in this exciting new season. I really admire your honesty and transparency about the joys and hardships of life after losing your husband--please continue to share them with us!

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  2. I usually lurk, but couldn't read this and not post. Something in me knew what you were going to say, and I wanted to tell you I am so thrilled for you, and honored that you've chosen to share this with your readers. God is so faithful!

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  3. Beautifully said! I know that was not easy to share but I am SO glad you did! I will continue to pray for you, to pray for God's plan for your life. You are an amazing woman, Bonnie Culp, and I am so happy that God has blessed you in this way!

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  4. Bonnie,
    Amazingly said. Your heart and your commitment to and love for God bring me joy every time I think of you. When I first heard this news a while back, my immediate reaction was joy and thankfulness for God's goodness. You and Tyler are an amazing blessing not only to each other, but also to your beautiful children and to all of us who surround you. I can't help but praise God for that!
    Laura

    PS - I had a great time watching the game with you guys yesterday, even if it was such an ugly game. The endless renditions of "Tomorrow" made it highly entertaining! :)

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  5. I love the comparison of your love for a second child. It's true that your love is not replaced. It just grows! Well said, as usual. So unbelievably glad to see you so happy.

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  6. Praise God from whom all blessings flow! How unsearchable and glorious are his ways. May He be with you and Tyler and continue to surprise you with his abounding love. We love you so much, too, and our love is also from Him.

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  7. I am SO thrilled! Thomas would be so happy for you too, honestly. You are such a beautiful soul and deserve every form of love imaginable in this life! Follow God and your heart! This is such beautiful news. :)

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  8. I'm definitely a lurker here - I rarely (if ever) post a comment. For some reason though, I am always drawn back to your blog and drawn to prayer for you and your family. It's odd to feel connected this way to complete strangers, but I guess that's what the internet does, right? :) I just had to say that I am SO HAPPY to read this post! Sometimes in the midst of all that is going on in our lives that cloud our vision (grief, stress, ambition, whatever) God has a way of breaking through all the fog and smacking us awake with his will. It's amazing! To know that God ordained this to be is so encouraging and comforting and exhilarating! I'll continue to pray for you and your kiddos and now for Tyler. God is obviously working in your life, and it's so inspiring to read about!

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  9. LOVE all of this. You are amazing and God is blessing you so much. You are so inspiring!!! So excited for you and the kids. You deserve the very best.

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  10. Bonnie, Thank you SO much for sharing this. I got goosebumps (aga9n) as I read this!!! GOD is good!!! I LOVE your point about loving another child just as much as the first. Our love does grow!!! And the parallel is so perfect. Thank you for making that point. May GOD continue to bless you, your little ones, AND Tyler in so many amazing ways.

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  11. I must confess that I was secretly hoping that you would be saying this. God truly is love, and he blesses us with the capacity to love more and more.

    Keep posting. We miss you out here.

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  12. I too am a lurker who rarely comments, but how could I not?! As soon as I read the first line, I felt like this is what you were going to share. (I even stopped reading and scrolled down to the end to see if it was! :)) I am so happy for you! God's faithfulness is truly amazing!!

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  13. Bonnie, this post gave me goosebumps and brought tears of joy to my eyes! It has been my prayer for several months now that even way back when your grief was still very new, that even then, God was preparing a man to love you. God put it on my heart to pray about this for you, and I hoped that this new man would be someone you and Thomas had known before. I know I shouldn't be surprised, because God does answer our prayers, but I am so amazed, and I am so happy for you!

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  14. As I was reading, I was hoping that's what you were going to say. So happy for you and your children. Congratulations, I'm so glad you found happiness again.

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  15. I guess it is the day for lurkers to come out! I am another longtime lurker. I am so happy to read this today. It just warms my heart. You have been through so much heartache, it is time for some happiness! God Bless!!

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  16. bonnie, i feel like i know you through dori and i've even met becky when i visited arkansas a while back. i've been praying for you and keeping up with your blog. i just wanted to let you know that i am so so so so so happy for you! :)

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  17. So happy for you! Glad you are doing well. We miss seeing y'all!

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  18. I wasn't crying until I got to the picture, then the waterworks. Even though we were in on it before this post, it still makes me so happy and thankful. Your writing was truly inspired and so respectful of all parties involved. We love you SO much! Denise

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  19. I usually lurk as well but I had to chime in and wish you a hearty congratulations!!! I am so thrilled to hear that the Lord has brought you Tyler and I look forward to following you and you continue the journey. May God bless you richly and abundantly!

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  20. WOW! What a wonderful, wonderful post....although I don't "know" you, I have read your blog for so long, that I feel like I do :) This is such amazing news, I absolutely LOVED your comparison of having a second child, that is a perfect way of explaining it. I am just SO HAPPY for you and wish you many blessings!
    Jess in Nebraska

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  21. Oh, happy day! I am so thrilled for you, Bonnie! Your commitment to follow Christ is so beautiful. I know Thomas is happy for you.

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  22. I have followed your story from day one and you DESERVE every bit of stinking happiness you have found. What an amazing story and I believe in all my heart that God brought the two of you together for a reason. Praise him and DON'T question it ever again. What a blessing for you and your amazing children. Praying for the perfect ending to such a simple beginning. Thanks for putting a smile on my face today sweet friend.

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  23. Sweet Bonnie, I don't know if you'll read all the way down here to me, but I just had to comment! Your love for your family and God is so apparent. God is so good to grow beauty out of ashes! What a wonderful blessing. I'm so happy for you! Your story is bringing Him glory!

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  24. Okay. I have to tell you. I am a complete stranger. I was led to your blog to pray for you within days of your loss. My heart just broke for you. Today. I am once again shedding tears for you. A beautiful, Godly woman that I have never met. I am so, so happy for you. I have continued to pray for you, continued to check in on you and your beautiful children. I prayed that your silence here had nothing to do with depression, but that the Lord was blessing you with happiness and bus-i-ness. I am SO happy that He has blessed you with someone to love and care for you and your children. PRAISE JESUS!!!!!! I am so glad that He increased your love once again! I am sure many of us...I hate to call us lurkers because I am sure most of us have been praying for you...your "prayer team"...are going to come out of the wood work to say yippee! So happy for you!!!!!

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  25. I don't know you personally, but have been reading your blog from the very beginning. I am also one of you "prayer team" and am so thrilled and excited to see this newest chapter in your life unfold. There is something amazing about KNOWING when it is GOD! Praise God for HIS faithfulness to you and your precious babies!

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  26. I have read your blog almost since the beginning. When the accident happened, I was brought to tears, well, bawling is more like it. I have followed but have never left a comment. I started reading this post and immediately tears started flowing again. What a gift! I am so happy for you and you deserve this. It came in God's time, what could be more wonderful. I will continue to pray for your family and all the blessings that will come. Debbie,

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  27. Oh Bonnie... I am just brought to tears. God is so faithful. I have prayed for you at every thought since I read your post about Thomas' death. My husband drives an hour to grad school and an hour back each day and I constantly think "what if." Your words have constantly encouraged me that no matter what, God is faithful. How precious. I pray His most abundant blessings on your family in the days to come.

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  28. You are amazing;) I think that was said perfectly:) I'm glad it's finally out there lol i can't wait to see all our tomorrows;) God is so faithful!

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  29. Bonnie,
    You are so beautiful, both inside and out, and knowing you are happy makes me smile! I still think about Thomas often, and pray for you and the kids daily. Tyler must be a very special man! I wish you all the happiness in this world...
    Love,
    Memorie

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  30. I'll fess up to being another lurker who's never commented. I've followed your blog since learning about your family in a prayer meeting.

    So so so so happy for you!! Had butterflies in my stomach while I read. You are a fabulous, Godly woman and it has been a blessing to read your story as it unfolds. You deserve every blessing that the Lord pours out on you.

    Thank you for sharing!

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  31. I'm one those - you don't know me, but I read your blog. I just had to comment and tell you HOW HAPPY I AM FOR YOU! This came as a complete surprise to me, but *fantastic*. Many hugs!

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  32. A stranger friend delurking to say congratulations and thank you for sharing this. Your point about making peace with raising your kids with you and God provided some inspiration I needed tonight. Wishing you joy!

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  33. Bonnie,
    I am so very happy for you! If anyone deserves happiness, it is certainly you!

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  34. oh Bonnie--I could cry reading this. So wonderful for you and your children. You know that your amazing Thomas would be proud of you. And you are right--he has no sadness.
    Congrats!!!

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  35. Bonnie,

    I usually lurk around here, but I wanted to post my congratulations to you, Caroline, Thomas and of course, Tyler, too. I think it's so wonderful and I am so happy for you all. What joyous news!

    I wish for you all the happiness in the world. You and your beautiful children deserve it.

    Blessings!

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  36. I've been reading for awhile, but rarely comment... but I just have to say I am so thrilled for you both. God is great and works in wonderful ways.

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  37. Another lurker here :)
    I remember hearing about the accident on the news & then running across your blog a few months later. I've been checking in (lurking) ever since then.

    You deserve to be happy!

    I'm happy you decided to share w/ all your readers.

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  38. Bonnie, what an exciting post! God is faithful all the time and His timing is always perfect. Congratulations to all of you!
    Brenda Elmore (Megan Smith's mom)

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  39. I too, am a stranger to you.. I was lead to your blog through another family memeber.. I first looked at you when you lost Thomas, and every since then I can't help but look in on you! You are one of the strongest women I know and I love to look at how your strength constantly grows. I just got married in March, and I can't imagine my life without my husband, especially having kids... I am inspired by you and your faith and love for the Good Lord! You are an amazing woman, and with that I wish you all of the happiness in the world, with a life of love and happiness from whomever you find to fullfill the emptiness and hurt! Caroline and Thomas have an amazing mother! God Bless you!
    Charlie

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  40. I don't think I've ever posted on your site, though I've been following for a while. But this post made me tear up, and I knew I just had to say, "Yay!!!!" I'm so impressed by the way you kept pushing into God right through your grief. Yes, praise him from whom all blessings flow. :)

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  41. I'm a stranger from Virginia that has prayed for you and your children. I am so happy God has given you a new love in your life. What a wonderful gift for you and your children.

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  42. Congratulations!! I've been following your journey for a while now. I am so HAPPY for you.

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  43. I could not be happier for you! From one "C of C gal" to another. :)

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  44. I too have been a reader from the beginning and have wondered why you hadn't posted in awhile ;-) Now I know... and I am beyond thrilled for you. Blessings to you in this new season.

    Still praying in WA,
    Maureen

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  45. Wow and congratulations. Wishing you both and the children the best of happiness. You deserve and God is Love!

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  46. Bonnie - We are so very happy for you....we can't wait to meet Tyler and hope that it will be soon. Ann and Charlie

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  47. Congratulations to you Bonnie! You really are such an inspiration to women everywhere and you truley deserve to be happy.

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  48. As soon as I started reading this post, I knew exactly where it was going...so happy for you!
    I have a friend who was widowed and left alone with 2 young children; she started dating again only a few months after her husband died, was engaged within a year of his death and was married within 18 months of his death.
    I struggled with it big-time and told her so...my bad. I have recently apologized to her for my wrong assumptions and feelings...she had every right to feel that love again and have a partner in her life to help her in raising her children.
    She loves her first husband still and still grieves him...and she loves her husband now, and he helps her in her grief. It's the most amazing sacrificial love I've ever seen, watching him love her through the times when she's racked with grief over the loss of her first husband.
    I am so very happy for you and your kids...and how cool how God just flipped that switch and let your sister in on it before you ever told her:)

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  49. I'm so glad you shared this story Bonnie! And you shared it so WELL!!

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  50. Yay, Bonnie! In reading your blog over the past 2 years, I've been so worried that you would never be open to dating again. I was afraid you would close yourself off to possible love out of a sense of loyalty. So, I was SO EXCITED to read this post. I know that with God on your side, you and Tyler will figure out how to navigate the sometimes strange reality of dating after a loss. You'll figure out how to keep Thomas' memory present, and stay connected with his family, and not make Tyler feel like an intruder. These things are tough - but you already know you have a champion to see you through. Blessings!!

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  51. Congrats, Bonnie!!! This post made me cry...you are so good at expressing yourself. So very happy for you!!!!!

    Blessings as you begin this new journey...

    Stacy
    (Cleveland, OH)

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  52. Hi Bonnie...yet another "prayer team" member here who has never posted. I've been reading since the beginning when Amy told me what happened. You don't know me, but I made baby Thomas his initial frame and when I first saw pictures of his nursery I was excited to see a little part of me in your world. I have prayed for you and watched your life evolve and am always humbled by your raw honesty and amazing strength. Your submission to His will has been rewarded in so many ways and I'm thrilled that Tyler is one of those blessings. I have had a heart string pull for the past few days to get on here to check on you. For some reason I've been waiting to read about your new love...the second I saw your title, I knew I wasn't crazy and that really was why God wanted me to read it. So now my prayers are a bit altered to include his name and not just "the man He has in store for Bonnie." We will all be honored to start praying for him too!! Continue to be happy and enjoy this next chapter! Blessings, Samantha

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  53. I, too, am a lurker, but I couldn't help but sending my prayers of joy up to God and telling you how thrilled I am to hear how He is working in your life. God really does work in amazing ways and I'm thrilled for you and your family. I love what you were saying about not replacing your love for your daughter when you had a son and the same can be true after your terrible loss. I didn't know Thomas, but I imagine him being thrilled in heaven that God is bringing you joy again. Don't mess with our God! :)

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  54. I don't know you, I don't know Tyler, but I have followed you since Thomas' death. My husband loves his family and if anything would have happened to him, he would want his family cared for, loved on, guided and protected. You are not replacing Thomas, you are adding to your life. And who's to say it is too soon, if it is God's timing...his timing is perfect. You are an amazing mom, and woman and God has graced you with a second wonderful man in your life..Praise God and congratulations Bonnie!!!!

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  55. Bonnie, I am SO excited for you! Love you.

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  56. Bonnie,
    I have to admit that I've been a bit of a stalker too. I came across your blog back in November or December of last year from Hannah Grace's blog. I am so drawn into your story and am thrilled to hear that God is caring you through this journey called life. Isn't it amazing what He already has planned for our lives and we just have to be patient and ride out those storms. My parents live in West Fork and the morning after Thomas' accident I was talking to my mom (we had snow here in Texas) and me being a teacher, was on my way to work and my mom told me about Thomas. It's so ironic that months after my mom told me about the accident that I came across your blog and couldn't pull myself away originally. I read the whole thing back to the beginning. Thank you for being so strong and I pray that God will continue to bestow His blessings upon you and your children and Tyler.

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  57. Oh my goodnes...
    I have never met you.
    I don't even know you with 6 degress of separation.
    I don't even know how I stumbled on your blog...
    But, I am totally crying.
    So happy for you!

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  58. Bonnie,
    I have followed your blog since the accident but have never commented before but feel I must today! First let me start by saying I have always admired your faith and strength all along. You have been such a good example to everyone.I am so excited for you and want you to know I think You have NOTHING to apoligize for. There will always be people who judge that's NOT there place.God has a plan for all of us and as long as we do the things he tells us to do we need not fear. I am crying tears of joy for you! I am so thrilled for ALL of you. Everyone deserves to have joy in there life and you more than the rest of us for being so faithful during your trial.Much love and prayers for continued happiness sent your way:)
    Charlene Robb
    Salt Lake City,Utah

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  59. Bonnie,
    I have followed your blog since the accident but have never commented before but feel I must today! First let me start by saying I have always admired your faith and strength all along. You have been such a good example to everyone.I am so excited for you and want you to know I think You have NOTHING to apoligize for. There will always be people who judge that's NOT there place.god has a plan for all of us and as long as we do the things he tells us to do we need not fear. I am crying tears of joy for you! I am so thrilled for ALL of you. Everyone deserves to have joy in there life and you more than the rest of us for being so faithful during your trial.Much love and prayers for continued happiness sent your way:)
    Charlene Robb
    Salt Lake City,Utah

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  60. So excited!! The best and only way is to wait for God so congrats on following Him and keep doing so! Love and prayers for a long time, Mari

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  61. I too lurk but have always been drawn back to your and Tara's Blogs from time to time---I too became a widow at an early age(32) when my husband was killed in a car accident in 1981. My son was 4 and I went through basically the same things you young ladies have experienced. My son and I continued our life together and never finding the just right relationship to share our life with.My family and my church family was our crutch and brought us through many tough times I taught school for 32 years and retired in 2004. My son is now 34 and still single but living in his own home close to me. I was certain I would continue my life as a single person until at our HS reunion year before last -- a guy that I hadn't seen since high school graduation!!!! We talked and visited at the reunion and several days later he called me. He was divorced and I was a single woman and I was for thefirst time really thrilled! God brought us together for a reason I am convienced and what a blessing it has been! I was widowed for 29 years but remarried this past July 2010!!!! Amazing for me to even think about but we are so happy and worth every year I was alone for in God's time only brought this wonderful person into my life! When I started reading your blog I had a feeling also what you were going to say and also skipped over and read the ending!!! I am so happy for you and your children!!!!You are so lucky to find this special someone when your children are young and need someone also. Your are so blessed!
    My son older but has certainly enjoys this step father.My father passed away in 1998 and that was another enpty place in our lives! They hunt, talk, fish, and hang out together and life is great for us all after all these years. Yes, God works in his own way and knows exactly what we need. My many blessings to you all!!!! God is GOOD!!!!

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  62. Hi, Bonnie: I am another stranger, who has visited your blog a few times. I wanted to tell you how sorry I am for your loss. I have prayed for you and your family. Even though I don't know you, I can tell from your blog that you are a very strong and brave woman. Your children are very lucky to have such a great mom. Finally, I wanted to say congrats to you and Tyler; reading that post made me very happy. God bless all of you!! Remember God is always the answer!!

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  63. Sweetness! God has plans for us...beyond grief and heartache! Can't say much else that hasn't already been said, but your story is one of hope.
    Thank you for sharing!

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  64. Bonnie, I too am a bit of a blog-stalker (and clearly given the date, much behind in my updates!) and just wanted to give you a big thumbs-up on this post. Congrats for having the courage it takes to go forward, and congrats for having the courage it takes to share that with all via the blog. Things are put into our lives for a reason- never apologize for happiness! Best to you!

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  65. Oh, Bonnie. I love you. And I'm crying from the joy of this. The joy of your healing--can't tell you how many times I've talked about you in the past couple of months as I've discussed Christ's Atonement with people. The joy of you finding more love and an additional father for your children. The joy, so deep it hurts, of knowing that God knows us and takes care of us. In his time, his way.
    This weekend I found pictures from my year at Harp. As I saw your picture, I couldn't help but think how much has changed since then. For me, but especially for you. And how that was such a brief encounter in the whole scheme of life. But I'm so, so grateful that it happened and that God put you in my life. And because of the marvels of technology you've been able to continue teaching me and helping me come to Christ. I really do love you.

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  66. Bonnie - I am so happy to read about this new blessing in your life! I have been reading your blog for a long time and come back to it every so often to check in on you and the kids. Your faithfulness to God has been a testament in and of itself. I look forward to hearing all about the happiness that He is bringing to you now. Know that all of your readers support you and want only the best for you and the kids!

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  67. Bonnie!!! That's wonderful. I'm so happy for you and Tyler and the kiddos and all that God is doing in your lives. You so deserve to be happy and loved and I'm glad God sent just the right person to do those things!

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  68. God IS truly amazing! You are right in saying on God really knows what we need and he always delivers! How gracious of you to be so open and, as always, honest...but your happiness is what is important! I am so thrilled for you, Caroline, Thomas...and Tyler!

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  69. Somehow I knew this was going to be what the post was about as soon as I started. Incredible! God is so wonderful and I don't think I've ever noticed how much work He can do for a person until I began reading your blog after the tragedy. You are an inspirational woman, and I am SO happy to see God working miracles in your life for you and the kids. I am so happy for you and this new chapter life brings.

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  70. Hi Bonnie, yet another lurker coming forward here. I've always read your blog, but maybe only posted one time?? But today I had to come forward and write to you - I'm so happy for the joy you have found and felt honored to read about it. I found I was holding my breath as I read your post, so hoping that what you were writing about was that. Blessings to you and I wish you all the best.

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  71. Bonnie, you don't know me nor I you but we have much in common. I lost my first husband and was pregnant with our second child many years ago. I put my life before God knowing he would help me raise my 2 children, then, along came my second husband after only 6 months. We have been married for 34 years and have two more children. God is good and no matter what the timing is, it is HIS timing. God bless you in this new normal!!

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  72. SOOOOO exciting!

    (i know I am really late with this post, but I just came across it, and I see you are engaged now to Tyler!)

    How wonderful, Praise God!

    Such a wonderful testimony to God.

    very happy for you guys!

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